You may have noticed a change to the appearance of this blog since your last visit. Of course, if it is your first visit, there is less of a shock. The truth is, I'm just learning how to use this blogger and I'm surprised by the different things available to make it prettier. So hope you don't mind as I experiment now and then with different color schemes and backgrounds. It's a lot easier than redecorating my house or trying out new hair colors, that's for sure.
In the meantime, I thought I'd share a personal story here from my day. Let me start with last night, actually. I was having dinner with four of the kids at a restaurant -- eating my salad -- when I started feeling some chest discomfort. Heartburn.
By the time I got home, I felt completely terrible and went to lay in bed. Our six-year-old daughter, J, came up to lay with me. She's always great at playing nurse when Mama feels bad. I could see that she was really concerned.
I asked her, "Do you want to pray for me?"
She did. She wanted to say the words -- and of all our children, she is the least likely to volunteer to say prayers in public (even in front of just our family), so I was surprised by this.
Sitting over me she prayed, "Jesus...?"
And then she got all choked up, to which I responded with my own quiet tears -- some for the pain, but mostly because I was immediately so in love with and proud of her in that moment.
"Please heal my mama and help her feel better. Don't let her die... Amen."
As I write more stories about my children -- even if I only use an initial for their names -- you will hopefully begin to get a sense of their very unique and special personalities. These kids are my shiny stars and no matter how crazy they make me some days, I can't help but just feel incredibly honored to be their mother.
Anyway, J is certainly an intelligent child. She's six, going on 26. She uses a lot of big vocabulary words, which gives me the grins (I love to write because I love the art of words). She is also very observant and sensitive about spiritual things and people. Much of what she says strikes me as profound somehow and she has taught me so much in her little life.
This prayer of hers was so completely honest. I continued crying quietly as she slid down the side of my bed and gathered tissues for both of us to dry our eyes. Then she proceeded to wrap a tiny teddy bear in another tissue, which she sprayed with one of my body sprays to smell nice, and she put it to my chest and told me to keep it next to my heart so I could feel the love and get better.
Almost immediately, I began feeling better. I told her this and she said, "Jesus heals people, Mama, and now He's healing you."
How many times have I complained to the Lord that our kids never listen?! And here, our youngest daughter was proving me wrong. "Lord, if it's my time to go, let me go home to you now because it's not getting much better than this."
But it wasn't my time. I suffered through the night with an ebb and flow of pain depending on my sleeping positions and after a call to my doctor this morning, I visited the Emergency Room. This was a scary time for me, not having spent much time in emergency rooms or hospitals, but I kept J's prayers and her hopefulness on the forefront of my mind. I thought about all our kids and how much they needed me, even when they don't think so.
I was relieved to be released three-and-a-half hours later after a battery of tests -- still in pain -- but with no evidence of serious heart trouble. I will continue seeking answers and healing, but for now, I'm home again.
I was greeted with welcome hugs and relieved children. It was so nice to feel missed in just those few hours I was away. What a strange and precious blessing on my day.